Luke's Power Rankings
Ichiro helped the M's take 2 of 3 from ATL (Getty)
Ichiro helped the M's take 2 of 3 from ATL (Getty)

Contributing Writer
Posted Jun 16, 2003

Luke adds a bit of his own touch to this week's power rankings, going with a movie theme in honor of the upcoming blockbusters this summer like...uh...nevermind. CAUTION; LAUGHABLE.

1. SEATTLE (1) - How are they here? The “Usual Suspects”: Edgar, Ichiro, Boone, pitching.

2. ATLANTA (2) - Could have been ranked first had they not been "Sweepless in Seattle."

3. SAN FRANCISCO (3) - "There’s Something About Barry."

4. NY YANKEES (8) - Steinbrenner’s gonna need “Anger Management” real soon.

5. LOS ANGELES (12) - Right now Kevin Brown is "As Good As It Gets."

6. BOSTON (6) - "The Byung-Hyun Kim Project" is failing: 15 IP 6.60 ERA since coming over from Arizona.

7. OAKLAND (10)- Mulder, Zito, and Hudson in “Young Guns.”

8. MONTREAL (4) - "Rocky VI: Biddle Saves the Day."

9. TORONTO (13) - Carlos Delgado is the “Demolition Man.”

10. MINNESOTA (7) - All they need is "A Few Good Mientkiewicz."

11. CHICAGO CUBS (9)v - Sammy Sosa is “Corky Romano.”

12. HOUSTON (5) - "Honey, I Shrunk the Outfield."

13. PHILADELPHIA (14) - I guess Silva and Mesa are ready to start their own “Fight Club.”

14. ST. LOUIS (11) - The Cardinals Bullpen - the "Knockaround Guys."

15. ANAHEIM (15) - “Angels in the Outfield” too obvious? How about “Charlie’s Angels”? “City of Angels”? Okay, “The Ring” - apparently, once you win it, you stay just barely above .500 the next year.

16. CINCINNATI (18) - “The Hunt for Red October” could get interesting.

17. KANSAS CITY (17) - The story of the Royals drop from the top: “Too Fast Too Furious."

18. COLORADO (16) - “Spaceballs.”

19. ARIZONA (19) - “Jurassic Park.”

20. BALTIMORE (20) - Albert Belle in “Money For Nothing” (it's true, he’s still on the payroll for $13 million this year).

21. FLORIDA (22) - The Marlins run at winning it all: “Mission: Impossible.”

22. NY METS (23) - Mo Vaughn is “Excess Baggage.”

23. CHICAGO WHITE SOX (21) - Preseason hype was "Much Ado About Nothing"... just ask Paul "Con-Air"ko.

24. PITTSBURGH (24) - The Pirates playoff hopes: "Gone in 60 Seconds."

25. TEXAS (26) - "Urbina Legends 3: Rumors of a Decent Pitcher."

26. CLEVELAND (25) - Milton Bradley is “Almost Famous.”

27. MILWAUKEE (27) - "Scream 4: Watching a Brewers Game."

28. TAMPA BAY (28) - The D Rays win the Series - A.K.A. "Apocalypse Now."

29. SAN DIEGO (29) - “Very Bad Things.”

30. DETROIT (30) - Sitting through an entire Tigers game is the “Sum of All Fears.”

Luke Lapinski lives in Tempe, AZ and attends the Arizona State University, where he hosts the radio show, "The Mad UnderGrads." He once ate a hot dog from the Kingdome and survived to tell about it. Luke enjoys reading feedback, and can be reached at

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