1. (2) SEATTLE - You know, maybe now would be a good time for teams to stop testing Ichiro’s arm.
2. (1) ATLANTA - Bobby Cox doesn't argue enough.
3. (5) SAN FRANCISCO - Still lead NL West despite injuries to Bonds, Nen, and Durham.
4. (4) MONTREAL - Winning no matter which country they play in.
5. (8) OAKLAND - Have been anything but stellar of late (10-10 in their last 20), but at least their fans show up to their games - wait, no they don’t.
6. (9) NY YANKEES- Isn’t it great? $teinbrenner’s already freaking out.
7. (6) LOS ANGELES - Won 10 in a row then lost 4 in a row to Colorado and Milwaukee... confusing.
8. (7) MINNESOTA - Leading the AL Central doesn't really say a whole lot.
9. (11) TORONTO - Baseball’s most potent offense and sweeps through the Yanks and Bosox have them just 2 games back in the AL East.
10. (3) BOSTON - Lose Pedro, get BK, huh? yeah, that sounds even.
11. (10) CHICAGO CUBS - So so without Sosa, but still good enough for 1st in NL Central.
12. (12) PHILADELPHIA - The whole Randy Wolf thing was starting to sound like that horrible Lance Bass movie, “On The Line”, which I HAVE NOT SEEN OF COURSE.
13. (14) HOUSTON - Still in the middle of the race despite the fact that Jeff Bagwell has apparently switched to a glass bat.
14. (13) ST. LOUIS - Underachiever : (un’der-a-chiev’er) n. 1. one who performs worse or achieves less than expected 2. St. Louis Cardinal.
15. (23) BALTIMORE - 9-2 in their last 11, they’ve quietly climbed above .500.
16. (17) ANAHEIM - Just wait till last year .
17. (20) COLORADO - Yeah the rankings sort of take a turn down from here.
18. (16) KANSAS CITY - Here’s the thing, its a 162 game season: 10-22 after starting off 17-4.
19. (19) CINCINNATI - So does Felipe Lopez just make an error in every game or how does this work?
20. (22) FLORIDA - They can’t even fire and hire their managers the right way.
21. (15) TEXAS - Todd Van Poppel has a win for them this year - Todd Van Poppel... of course, his ERA is 8.53...
22. (24) NY METS - Not to pile on, but did you know they’re paying John Franco $3.9 million this year?
23. (18) CHICAGO WHITE SOX - Offensive problems? gee, you tell me: 41 runs over last 19 games including getting shut out by Detroit at home.... oh and Konerko’s hitting a whopping .201.
24. (21) ARIZONA - DL'd Rookie Brandon Webb could be the next big thing: 6 starts, 35 K’s, 2.14 ERA.
25. (25) PITTSBURGH - Sure they’re not good and they don’t win, but nobody’s perfect.
26. (26) CLEVELAND - At least Milton Bradley’s got game.
27. (28) MILWAUKEE - Ever watch paint dry? I’d stick to that.
28. (27) TAMPA BAY - No, Julio Lugo is not the answer. Just no.
29. (29) SAN DIEGO - When they play baseball, it makes me sad.
30. (30) DETROIT - Well, at least the Pistons are still in - ah, forget it.
Luke Lapinski lives in Tempe, AZ and attends the Arizona State University, where he hosts the radio show, "The Mad UnderGrads." He once ate a hot dog from the Kingdome and survived to tell about it. Luke enjoys reading feedback, and can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.